Hello, besties! So, last night, while I was doom-scrolling through Instagram (as one does, duh!), I came across a post that said, “Real maturity is knowing friendship breakups hurt worse than actual breakups.” And while that might not be my exact definition of maturity, the statement does hit hard.

Just like a teen messaged me last night saying they broke up with their best friend. It’s like, no one really talks about it, right? We talk about relationship breakups all the time, but what about that kind of hurt? The one that comes when your best friend is no longer by your side.

I mean, losing my best friend? Can’t imagine—and honestly, don’t want to imagine. So, I thought, if I’m feeling this way, surely you must have felt this way too. And tadaaa! Aise thodi na main tumhe kisi problem se akele deal karne dungi.

So let’s tackle this crisis together, shall we?

1. Feel all the feels

Friendship breakups hit harder than stepping on a Lego, and it’s okay to admit it. Cry, scream into a pillow, or even vent to your diary. Let yourself feel all the emotions instead of bottling them up.

“Apne dard ko ignore mat karo, bro. Identify it, feel it and move on!”

Pro tip? Binge-watch your comfort shows (hint: Brooklyn Nine-Nine or F.R.I.E.N.D.S) or blast some Taylor and Olivia songs to get it all out. 

2. Stop the blame game 

“Was it something I said? Did I overshare? Was my vibe off?” STOP. Friendships end for a million reasons—people grow apart, life happens, or priorities change. It’s not always about something you did or didn’t do.

It’s important to remind yourself that relationships are a two-way street. If your friend didn’t communicate their issues or decided to walk away without explanation, that’s on them—not you. You can’t carry the entire weight of a friendship on your shoulders.

3. Talk it out (If You Can) 

If you feel the friendship ended over some miscommunication, take a deep breath and reach out. Slide into their DMs or ask to meet up. But keep it cool—no drama, just straight up honesty. Use this line: “Hey, I feel like we’ve grown distant, and I miss our friendship. Did I do something to upset you?” If they respond, great! If not, at least you tried.

4. Accept the unfriending 

Not every friendship can be salvaged, and that’s okay. If they’re not ready to fix things, or if they’ve made it clear they’re moving on, it’s time to let go. Holding on will only hurt you more.

Let’s be honest, Kuch log bas ek season ke liye hote hain, not the whole series. Aur ye bhi theek hai. It’s all for the plot baby!

5. Lean on other people 

Your ex-BFF isn’t your only person. And don’t let one bad experience stop you from trusting new people and experiences. Lean on your other friends, siblings (even the annoying ones), or that one cousin who gets you. This is also a great time to make new friends—join a club, take up a hobby, or just vibe with someone new. Fun Fact: Your next BFF could be someone you’d never expect, like the person you sit next to in class but barely talk to. Give it a shot!

6. Glow-up time, baby 

Here’s the tea: a friendship breakup is the perfect excuse for a you-glow-girl moment. Focus on yourself—pick up that hobby you’ve been procrastinating on, start journaling, or treat yourself to a mini self-care sesh. You’re the main character of your life, and nothing can dim that spotlight. “Apna time bhi aega my lord!”

7. Time is the real MVP 

Healing takes time, but it happens. Slowly but surely, you’ll stop missing them as much. Instead of feeling hurt, you’ll remember the good times with a smile. Trust the process, bestie. Reminder: “Time doesn’t erase memories, but it softens the edges.”

Friendship breakups suck, but they’re also a chance to grow. You’ll learn more about what you need from a friend and how to be an even better one yourself. And hey, every ending makes space for a new beginning.

If you ever feel stuck or need to rant, you know where to find me. Disha’s chai corner is always open for you. 

Love and hugs,
Disha